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Monday, May 19, 2008

Founding fathers: a present day conversation

Thomas Jefferson and Ben Franklin enjoying a conversation in present day Philadelphia at the local seven eleven.

Thomas Jefferson: Benjamin Franklin whence has our language of English dissipated into the current cesspool like state of ill be gone skull duggery?

Benjamin Franklin: Relax bro. You just got to roll with the times you know what i'm saying?

Thomas Jefferson: Pray tell whatever do you mean? The tongue of a 2008 imbecile you have acquired and I have no thought, whim, or idea of what you are speaking of.

Benjamin Franklin: I'm sick of your bullshit dawg. Can't you be cool for once.

Thomas Jefferson: Must every syllable out of your mouth be of cursory? You swear as frequently as the tealess distributors of the East India tea company.

Benjamin Franklin: That is how we talk down here. Swear words are adjectives for example right now i'm going to do some bomb ass mushrooms and fly a kite yo.

Thomas Jefferson: You will locate me yonder as I would prefer to exclude myself from the proximity of these mushroom ass bombs. They sounds quiet unpleasant.

Benjamin Franklin: Bitch go buy me some funyuns . For such a smart guy you aren't adjusting too well to the 2000's. Oh snap I just got a text from the JQA.

Thomas Jefferson: Who prey tell is the JQA?

Benjamin Franklin: John Quincy Adams fool. He's in vegas with two call girls and he's down on his luck cause he just lost his horses at the tables.

Thomas Jefferson: Well at least he retained his slave workers.

Benjamin Franklin: Shit son do you want to get capped? There ain't no slaves here. That was our worst idea. This world is all about equality. We may speak like dumb ass mo fo's sometimes but at least we get along down here. Remember all men are created equal and that includes women as well.

Thomas Jefferson: I see but without other people taking up my flowerly pursuits and chores how will i ever get out my eloquent documents and phrases, many of which are completely irrelevant in todays world?

Benjamin Franklin: You're still a rich ass white man. Just pay the less well off to do the work for you.

Thomas Jefferson: Well put well put. Now i know what you are saying.


Bridget said...

Seriously how do you think of this stuff? Good Times...

Bubbles said...

HaHaHa - Hilarious yet with a punch. Keep up your great work :)

ssgreylord said...

Always entertaining. Always.

David Tamayo said...

Ha! amazing we are even the same country. My how times change. =) I could actually picture that conversation in my mind...scary.

Regretful Morning said...

Haha, keep these coming!

myktoronto said...

Ben is chill. If he could get Tommy on the business end of a blunt and slip him a couple of 3 alarm taquitos and a Red Bull the dude'll fall right into line with the times.

Dang Tim that was another original! (:-D


How do you come up with this stuff? Just when I think you can't get any funnier you do!

Buffalo T-shirts said...

Funny stuff. Can't wait to hear what washington thinks.

Susanno said...

Wow... :) whats a joke. As your Blog title, this one is entertaining much. Nice refreshing post and thanks for sharing.

Will said...

I came to comment after reading this intending to say the exact same thing as Bridget. How long does it take to think up this stuff! Great post!